roguedreams: (mopey)
Ugh. Hormones couldn't you just fuck off? I'm so GRUMPY today. -_-

I couldn't have slept enough last night if I was still in bed right now it feels like. Work was very busy but pretty good. The weather sucks and I'm not entirely sure what to do about winter shoes. I don't really have work suitable ones right now.

I am fretting about my outfit for a 40th birthday party next month. I have the most amazing dress (e-gads it's my mothers wedding dress no less - deep red velvet beautifulness) and the theme of the party is 'Extravagence'. It will be, I imagine. I want to do Marmie's dress proud but have no fecking idea what to wear with it.

Hornby Laithe (weekend away for a bunch of friends that we do every year for those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about) stuff is stressing me somewhat but that's perfectly manageable stress. Just right now it makes me want to cry.

Waz is stressing me but that's also because I'm hormonal so I'm avoiding him and his worrying at me and hassling me if I'm ok is making me resentful.

Augh.

I hate the fact that Mother Natures Monthly Gift (-_- screw you Nature) comes with a massive dose of the Crazy. This comes complete with waves of dark moods, grouchiness and the worst sense of self-loathing/ lack of self worth. I just turn into this tightly wound ball of Angry-Worthlessness that feels guilty for everything and then feels guilty for feeling guilty. It's awful.
roguedreams: (yearning)
I am sad to say that my temp contract at Guide Dogs ends next Friday. :o( With all of the stuff with the organisation change and people being put at risk of redundancy they've decided to let go of as many temp. staff from agencies as they can get away with and I fall into that category. It makes sense, it's completely fair, my boss has been brilliant about it and I hold no grudge or animosity but it still sucks. While the job is not challenging enough, was never going to be permanent and had no real career progression even if it was permanent... I still loved every minute of working with Heather and the rest of thems at Guide Dogs. The charity has a very special place in my heart and I am certain that this will not be the end of my relationship with them.

I've been promised a glowing reference and first call on any positions that might come up in the new and improved version of Guide Dogs and for that I'm grateful.

I'm going to tell the others in the office next week as it's one of the lady's 50th birthday and I wouldn't want to put a downer on that.

Now comes the job hunting in earnest. Augh I feel a bit sick at the prospect to be honest. First thing tomorrow will mean calling my recruitment consultant and putting her on my sorry case.

I'd really, really like to get a job I stay in for more than 7 months. That'd be nice.

Wish me luck guys, I'm going to need it.

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roguedreams

January 2012

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